Each month, I reflect on the insights I can share to help you live a more fulfilling life and expand your perceptual lens—the lens through which you view the world. But this time, as the days passed, nothing came. No spark. No inspiration.

For years, I labeled myself a procrastinator, especially during my corporate career, when I would always wait until the last minute to complete projects. But when I extended myself some grace, I realized I wasn’t procrastinating—I was waiting for inspiration, and inspiration can never be forced. (I also learned that I work well under pressure, which is a topic for another day.)

This month, inspiration finally arrived unexpectedly—through a conversation on social media. I found myself engaging with someone who was openly judgmental. This person, a Christian, was criticizing other Christians for their religious practices. What always stands out to me is how some religious individuals—those who profess a deep love for God—can be among the most judgmental, which is the very opposite of what God asks of us—”love thy neighbor as thyself.”

As I gently offered some wisdom, it struck me: judgment would be the perfect topic for this month. Although this social media conversation was rooted in religion, the message for you goes far beyond that.

Judgment affects all areas of life—our relationships, workplaces, and even how we see ourselves. So, let’s dive in.

The Power (and Pitfall) of Judgment

In my coaching training, I learned that judgment is the act of labeling something as right or wrong, good or bad. It took me a long time to wrap my head around this concept. I mean, doesn’t everybody judge? But once I grasped it, my perspective dramatically shifted.

We all grow up with beliefs shaped by our experiences and teachings. Too often, we are told, “This is the right way,” implying that every other path must be wrong.

Such thinking closes the door to understanding, compassion, and love, fostering division instead of connection.

This division is glaringly evident in today’s world, where polarization seems to be everywhere. But there’s an alternative: shifting from judgment to assessment.

Judgment vs. Assessment: The Key Difference

Judgment often involves moral or personal condemnation, driven by ego and emotion. It tends to be rigid, final, and limiting, focusing on right versus wrong or good versus bad. This mindset leads to criticism, resentment, or division, leaving little room for growth or understanding. For example, saying, “That person is lazy” is a final, condemning judgment that offers no opportunity for change or deeper perspective.

Assessment, in contrast, is a neutral evaluation of facts or situations that helps us make informed decisions.

Driven by wisdom and understanding, it is objective, open-minded, and constructive. Unlike judgment, assessment focuses on facts and consequences without emotional bias, enabling problem-solving, decision-making, and growth.

Assessment happens when our perceptual lens is wide open. For instance, saying, “This person missed deadlines. They may be struggling with time management or personal challenges” is an observational statement that leaves room for understanding and potential solutions. Even scripture warns against judgment while encouraging thoughtful discernment.

A Biblical Perspective

Judgment (Condemnation): Matthew 7:1 – “Do not judge, or you too will be judged.” (Warns against harsh, self-righteous judgment)

Assessment (Discernment): Proverbs 15:14 – “The discerning heart seeks knowledge, but the mouth of a fool feeds on folly.” (Encourages thoughtful evaluation)

How to Open Your Perceptual Lens and Avoid Judgment

Pause Before Reacting – Ask yourself: Am I labeling this as right or wrong, or am I evaluating the situation objectively?

Seek to Understand – Consider the other person’s background, struggles, and perspective.

Reframe Your Thoughts – Replace condemning statements with observations. Instead of “They’re rude,” try “They interrupted me several times—maybe they don’t realize it.”

Extend Grace – Just as I learned to extend grace to myself regarding my creative process, we can offer grace to others as well.

The more we practice assessment instead of judgment, the more we expand our perceptual lens. We create space for understanding, compassion, and deeper connections.

My social media conversational companion stood firm in her righteousness, challenging me to find scripture to prove her wrong. I responded, “My goal isn’t to prove you wrong. This isn’t about being right or wrong—that’s judgment. I’m simply asking you to love your fellow Christians, regardless of how they choose to express their faith.” Then I asked, “With so many pressing concerns in the world, why direct energy toward criticizing those who share your love for Christ?”

Final Thought

The world is filled with diverse perspectives. When we let go of the need to judge and instead choose to assess, we open ourselves to growth and transformation. Shifting from judgment to assessment not only deepens our relationships but also increases our happiness. When we release the stress and negativity that come with judgment, we cultivate a sense of inner peace.

Additionally, research shows that practicing compassion and open-mindedness can reduce stress, lower blood pressure, and even strengthen the immune system. Judgment weighs us down, while understanding lifts us up.

Let’s challenge ourselves to replace judgment with curiosity and see how our lives shift—for the better.

Do you struggle with judgment or self-condemnation? Let’s take the next step. Request a no-cost Discovery Session today and get your life back.